Sometimes you look at the world around you and you judge yourself by what others are doing and what opportunities they have that you don’t. Sometimes you look at yourself and judge yourself and feel like you’ve failed at life, because seriously, everything you try just jumps back at your face laughing at your tenacity to hang on. But that’s just it. You have the tenacity to hang on. You may hit rock bottom. You may feel like everything you do turns out terrible, that even when it seems like it’s going ok, it goes downhill again. But in reality, you are fighting. You may not have the same opportunities as everyone else, but you sure as heck will have amazing opportunities yourself in time. You just have to wait, and push through, and keep hanging on. Because you are NOT A FAILURE. Just because you fail at something, does not make you yourself a failure. You have so much potential. But sometimes you just have to hit the bottom and go back up fighting for your life before anything happens.
As J.K. Rowling said about herself: “Why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me. It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all — in which case, you fail by default.”
Rowling is an example of someone who hit rock bottom and dug herself out to become one of the most brilliant writers of our age. She did not let her failure define her and keep her down.
My theme song for my life right now is Fight Song by Rachel Platten. The chorus helps to keep me going.
“This is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I’m alright song
My power’s turned on
Starting right now I’ll be strong
I’ll play my fight song
And I don’t really care if nobody else believes
‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me”
I’ve realized that this time in my life is probably the best and worst possible time (so far) in my life. I’ve had some amazing experiences, but have hit rock bottom as well. I’ve always come up fighting, even if I only felt like I grasped some air before going under again. This transition period feels like hell and happiness all bundled up in one. You have to decide which path to take. Will you keep fighting or will you let the feeling of failure drag you down until you no longer want to keep fighting?
“The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive.” – J.K. Rowling